Dear Diary,

Today we let the chickens “free range.” They pecked at a wall of dead foliage which I eventually ripped down creating a “dead stuff jungle gym.”

My great Aunt Alice stuck her head in the oven like Sylvia Plath.

I finally strung up some corn. I bought the pre-shucked kind so there was no clear spot to wrap the string and also I didn’t have string so I secured gold ribbon between trenches dug by kitchen sciossors.

My great Aunt Boo lost her eyebrows via over plucking.

I think chickens are attracted to shiny things.

There is always something caught in my throat.

a.

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